What
is Attachment Disorder/
Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD)?
Attachment
is defined as the affectional tie between two people. It begins
with the bond between the infant and mother. This bond becomes
internally representative of how the child will form relationships
with the world. Bowlby stated "the initial relationship between
self and others serves as blueprints for all future relationships."
(Bowlby, 1975)
Attachment Disorder is defined
as the condition in which individuals have difficulty forming
lasting relationships. They often show nearly a complete lack
of ability to be genuinely affectionate with others. They typically
fail to develop a conscience and do not learn to trust. They do
not allow people to be in control of them due to this trust issue.
This damage is done by being abused or physically or emotionally
separated from one primary caregiver during the first 3 years
of life. "If a child is not attached-does not form a loving
bond with the mother-he does not develop an attachment to the
rest of mankind. The unattached child literally does not have
a stake in humanity" (Magid & McKelvey 1988) They do
not think and feel like a normal person. "At the core of
the unattached is a deep-seated rage, far beyond normal anger.
This rage is suppressed in their psyche.
Now we all have some degree
of rage, but the rage of psychopaths is that born of unfulfilled
needs as infants. Incomprehensible pain is forever locked In their
souls, because of the abandonment they felt as infants."
(Magid & McKelvey 1988) "There is an inability to love
or feel guilty. There is no conscience. Their inability to enter
into any relationship makes treatment or even education impossible."
(Bowlby 1955) Some infamous people with Attachment Disorder that
did not get help in time: Adolph Hitler, Saddam Hussein, Edgar
Allen Poe, Jeffery Dahmer, and Ted Bundy. One famous person with
Attachment Disorder who did get help in time (in 1887!) and became
one of greatest humanitarians is Helen Keller.
Attachment
Disorder Symptoms
- Superficially
engaging & charming
- Lack
of eye contact on parents terms
- Indiscriminately
affectionate with strangers
- Not
affectionate on Parents’ terms (not cuddly)
- Destructive
to self, others and material things (accident prone)
- Cruelty
to animals
- Lying
about the obvious (crazy lying)
- Stealing
- No
impulse controls (frequently acts hyperactive)
- Learning
Lags
- Lack
of cause and effect thinking
- Lack
of conscience
- Abnormal
eating patterns
- Poor
peer relationships
- Preoccupation
with fire
- Preoccupation
with blood & gore
- Persistent
nonsense questions & chatter
- Inappropriately
demanding & clingy
- Abnormal
speech patterns
- Triangulation
of adults
- False
allegations of abuse
- Presumptive
entitlement issues
- Parents
appear hostile and angry
Causes
Any
of the following conditions occurring to a child during the first
36 months of life puts them at risk:
- Unwanted
pregnancy
- Pre-birth
exposure to trauma, drugs or alcohol
- Abuse
(physical, emotional, sexual)
- Neglect
(not answering the baby’s cries for help)
- Separation
from primary caregiver (i.e. Illness or death of mother or
severe illness or hospitalization of the baby, or adoption
- On-going
pain such as colic, hernia or many ear infections
- Changing
day cares or using providers who don’t do bonding
- Moms
with chronic depression
- Several
moves or placements (foster care, failed adoptions)
- Caring
for baby on a timed schedule or other self-centered parenting
