Healing
from a Heartbreak Caused by RAD
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When
a child has abused the mom to the point that they must be moved
out of the home, whether it be temporary of permanent, the Mom
must have time to heal. If we look at the healing process of a
broken leg in relationship to a broken heart the overview may
be more clear. With a broken leg the leg must be set in the best
situation to heal (a cast). During the healing time (especially
in the beginning) the pain is very acute and any jarring or prodding
at the wound will increase the pain and slow down healing. Loved
ones would not think of doing such a thing! The doctor will often
recommend propping it up and avoiding using it for a few weeks
and then minimum protected use for six weeks or more. When we
have emotional pain there is often a need for time to not poke
and jar the memory but to let it rest and heal. With a broken
heart the healing will take years!
After
the cast comes off then the physical therapy must begin and exercise
although painful is often required. The emotional healing after
a time of rest is also difficult and requires courage and endurance.
The
healing time can begin for the parents when they are not being
prodded and jarred by reminders of the child and the illness.
I hope the healing can begin right away. Both parents can have
their health highly affected by the major stress that a mental
illness will bring into a home.
If
you have entrusted your child to the care of someone else. The
new caregivers must NOT be criticized or corrected or directed.
That family needs support, encouragement and appreciation. I know
it is hard to give when you are exhausted but it is important
to at least send them a card or two.
You
have done your time. You did the best that you could. You have
set an example of love, honesty and integrity for the child to
follow. It is now time for you to pick up the pieces of your family
that were left battered and bleeding and support each other through
the healing time. Broken hearts can heal just as a broken leg
can!
Families by Design
PO Box 2812
Glenwood Springs, CO 81602
970-524-4111
ncthomas@rof.net
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